7 Signs You’re a Dog Dad (And You Should Own It)

Let’s not overthink it: if you’ve ever cancelled plans because the dog looked sad—you’re probably a dog dad.

This isn’t just about owning a dog. It’s about becoming a man whose entire identity now includes squeaky toys, matching hoodies, and saying “who’s a good boy?” with full emotional commitment.

Here are 7 signs you're deep in the dog dad game. No judgment. Only pride.

1. You talk about your dog. Constantly.

New job? Great, but did you see my dog’s latest head tilt?
Conversations drift back to your dog like they’re magnetic. And yes—you talk to them, too. Full monologue. Baby voice. No regrets.

2. The dog owns the bed

You said “no dogs on the bed.”
Then came the puppy eyes. The dramatic sigh. The tactical paw.
Now you’re curled up like a guest in your own house, and it’s... kind of cute.

3. You don’t get cat people

Look, cats are fine. But dogs? Dogs are chaos with a heart of gold.
Dog videos? Therapy. Bark memes? Culture. Your Discover feed knows the truth.

4. Your dog dresses better than you

You’ve skipped a haircut, but your dog has a seasonal outfit rotation.
Matching jumpers? You’ve thought about it. Bought them? Same.

5. You sign cards with your dog’s name

Christmas. Birthdays. Congrats on the baby.
Every card now reads:
“Love from me and Luna 💕”
(And honestly? It slaps harder that way.)

6. Your camera roll is 94% dog

The other 6% is accidental screenshots and blurry toes.
You’ve got folders. Live photos. Portrait mode dog content.
And you’ve shown strangers. In public.

7. Your dog has a social account

At first it was just for fun.
Now your dog has followers. A bio. Custom emojis.
You say “we” when checking notifications.

Welcome to the club.

If you ticked off even one of these, congrats. You’re a dog dad.
You’re in deep—and you wouldn’t change a thing.

Own it. Wear it. Walk it.
That’s the energy.